Hey, World

WebMD Middle Ages

roachpatrol:

sashayed:

elucubrare:

Q: I have, of late, felt strange pain in mine elbow

A: Prepare thy soul to be shriven, for thou hast THE PLAGUE

Try These Home Remedyes

  • take in thy hand a Scourge haveing 3 Tayles, and with it flagellate thy sinnful bodye in the publick Road, crying Mercie of God 
  • have lesse blood
  • hast thou tried Arsenic

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36 out of 39 serfs founde thys helpfull

if thou dost not posess a sufficiency of time for the weaving of thine own sacks for a sackcloth & ashys perdition garment, store boute ys fine

Reblogged 2 years ago from sairobee (Originally from elucubrare) 112,193 notes

business email glossary

  • thanks in advance:get this done by the time i press "send"
  • thanks for your interest:why'd you have to bring this up
  • would you be so kind:fucking do it
  • best:i have never physically met you
  • all best:this conversation is over
  • all my best:i wish you would die
  • happy to help:this is the easiest thing in my inbox
  • i hope this helps:i've done all i'm willing to do
  • i did a bit of research:i googled it, because you're too lazy to
  • sorry to chase:answer my email
  • so sorry to chase:answer my FUCKING email
  • i am really sorry for being a pest but:i am LIVID that you are ignoring me
  • please contact my colleague:this isn't my problem
  • i'm copying in my colleague:this isn't my problem and i am thrilled about it
  • i'll check and get back to you:i might forget to
  • i'll let you know when i hear anything:i will forget to
  • can you check back with me in a week?:i'm hoping you will forget to
  • per our earlier conversation:i just yelled at you on the phone
  • great to chat just now:you just yelled at me on the phone
  • thanks!:i'm not mad at you
  • thanks!!:please don't be mad at me
  • thanks!!!:i'm crying at my desk
  • please advise:this might be your fault
  • kindly advise:this is entirely your fault
  • mind if i swing by?:i'm already in the elevator
  • can you confirm for me:you told me before and i deleted the email
  • sorry if that was unclear:i think you're an idiot
  • let me know if you need anything else:please never contact me again
Reblogged 2 years ago from crystallizedtwilight (Originally from maralie) 385,794 notes